The Ice Pirates

Avast, ye space mateys! Con and Dan haul anchor and set sail for the 80s yet again for a slice of semi-spoof space operatics in the form of The Ice Pirates (1984), which stars Robert Urich, Mary Crosby, Michael D. Roberts and features early appearances from Anjelica Houston and Ron Perlman. Set in another galaxy far, far away, where water has become a rare commodity, the film starts out as a heist caper, then takes a weird left-turn into castration and slavery before ending with a battle in a time warp on the way to finding a fabled water-rich planet. It has lasers and robots, but also knee boots, chain mail, cutlasses and an alarming amount of swinging on ropes. Not to mention something called 'space herpes'. But is it still entertaining when you're no longer 10 years old? Find out!

 

---

Follow us on Threads, Facebook, Instagram and maybe Twitter, if it's still functioning.

Support us on Patreon to nominate future films, vote on whether films should be released or thrown back, and access exclusive bonus content!